The Dealmaker

by Katy Franklin.

In my last article, “The Dealbreaker,” someone posted a comment suggesting my next one be about “DealMAKERS.” I thought that was a great idea. Instead of being so negative, and discussing how guys can turn us off, I wanted to show some ways in which guys can turn us ON. So now, I give you “Dealmakers,” otherwise known as 50 things guys can do to make us smile, make us sit up and pay attention, make us think twice about them, or even make us fall in love with them.

He has great teeth

He opens the car door for you (even if you’d rather get it yourself, you have to admit it’s a sweet, old-fashioned gesture.)

He asks your drink and then gets one for you

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Game-playing Difficulties When Trying To Start Healthy Dating Relationships

You'd think that things would get easier with dating personals. Since they put you in contact with so many people, it should be easy to find someone with whom you're compatible and with whom you can start healthy dating relationships. The thing is, even if you can find a person who's potentially compatible, it doesn't mean that everything's going to go well or smoothly. We've all had a failed relationship or two that we know didn't necessarily have to fail.

Dating, Online and Otherwise

by Jerry Whiting.

To say that internet dating has changed being single is an understatement. Heck, it’s even changed cheating. One searches the other’s email, text messages, voicemail, IM, MySpace, Facebook, YouTube, Flickr, whatever, and busts them.

Online dating harbors little of the stigma it once did. One is no longer labeled a loser for using the net to hunt/shop/forage. As craigslist has undermined newspaper classifieds and travel sites have dealt a blow to travel agents, online dating sites like match.com, nerve, eHarmony, et al. have unraveled traditional face-to-face dating. Are you ashamed to tell family and friends how you met your latest mate? Speaking of which, how honest are you online when you described yourself? How honest were they?

Ladies, if you’re going to use craigslist to shop for a man (or any other dating site for that matter), please take a moment to read my advice for women and craigslist. Being a free country, you’re free to ignore part or all of what I have to say. Otherwise you may find yourself guilty of these known craigslist sins. You may, just may, find that heeding some of my suggestions will aid in your search for Mr. Right (or Mr. Wrong if that’s your kink. See “samsara”.)

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Kissing Techniques For Breakups

When a relationship ends, one always hopes that one is able to part amicably with one's partner. There's nothing worse than a hard breakup with lots of drama that leaves both parties bitter and angry. I'm sure many of you have been through it, and I hope that you never have to go through it again. You might think that it's weird to talk about kissing techniques for the final kiss, but it might be worth thinking about. Then you can get on with things and check out some dating personals sites.

How to nose around without being too nosy – A dating guide

by Rose Johnson.

Wow! Not only is your online date good looking, suave, well-dressed, but a rock star/investment banker/rocket scientist? Sounds too good to be true — and, chances are — it might not be true at all. From my year or so of online dating, I’ve learned how to sort the good apples from the bad and I’d like to share some of the tricks I’ve picked up to background-checking potential dates.

It’s human nature to inflate our accomplishments, pat ourselves on the back, and brag a little, especially when you’re speaking to an attractive member of the opposite sex. In the context of online dating, it’s even easier to create a false persona, to portray ourselves in just the right light. It’s so easy to change a B.A. in English to a M.A. in Physics with just the switch of a single letter. It’s even easier to add an extra zero added to your yearly income. And when the time comes, it’s still easy to carry out this persona. A rented car to impress a date? Just make sure the Budget sticker is inconspicuous. A borrowed apartment? Not to worry, just insure that your date doesn’t notice the Metamucil in the medicine cabinet or the six bottles of vodka in the recycling – “it’s not mine! I swear!” might not cut it.

White lies are fine, we all want to impress our dates, but I want to give you the advice that I’ve learned for some good back-ground checking to make sure your date is really who they say are. On my first online date, after an hour of good conversation flirtatious eyelash-batting with “David,” the “stable Physics graduate student,” it leaked that he had been a “graduate” of college for ten years without a job, without a relationship, and was currently couch-surfing between friend’s pads. I’m not here to pass judgment on those couch-surfing unemployed guys – for all we know, they could be the one! – but I am here to pass judgment on liars. An unemployed creep with a thing for feet could be disguised as an upright investment banker and I’m here to tell you just how to distinguish the two.

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How to Ditch a Bad Date?

Have you ever been in a date that you know is headed in a train wreck but you don’t exactly know how to escape? This video offered some tips on how you can get out from a bad date without making too much of a fuss. My personal favorite? The fake allergies!

Secrets Of The Boys Club: What Guys Really Think The First Time They See You

by Matt Titus.

There is one thing I try to convey to all of the women I work with: most men do not approach a woman because he thinks she is moral, funny or smart. His initial intention is to sleep with her. I know this sounds harsh and it may be shocking, but it’s true. I am a man and it has never been my intention to approach woman to make a new friend. I have enough friends and none of them wear make-up or smell pretty.

I try to teach women how to think like a man while never losing sight of her femininity. In most cases, a man’s actions are (unfortunately) driven by what pleases him visually, acting out of instinct and only thinking in the moment. My basic thesis is that if a woman can be taught to understand a man’s dating behavior, she can easily control, predict and successfully maneuver through all the confusing “MANerisms” during that date. In other words, I teach women how to speak “man.”

So here’s secret #1 of the Boy’s Club: when a man walks down a crowded street he involuntary classifies all women into two categories: “would sleep with” and “wouldn’t sleep with.”

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Speaking the Universal Language of Emotion

by Joshua Thompson.

Buddha said, “We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.” Our thoughts honestly control what we do. There is plenty of material written on this. So I won’t get into it too much.

We are a product of what we think…but also what we feel. And I think our feelings aren’t focused on enough.

Honestly, we are mostly emotionally beings. We act based on thoughts, we react based on emotions. Our emotions can stimulate us to do things. They can also stimulate us to ignore reason.

This is the idea that women can really mess you up…because you don’t think logically. Your control is overrun by your emotional language.

But how does this apply to your dating?

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The “Dealbreaker”

by Katy Franklin.

Every girl has her own little hang-ups about a guy that drive her crazy. Whether you’re out on a first date with someone, have been dating him casually for quite some time, or have been in a long-term relationship with a man, these little annoyances can become “Dealbreakers” or “DB’s,” as my friends and I so lovingly refer to them. Some are not so bad, while others can be totally devastating to a first date, or a committed relationship. So I thought long and hard and came up with a list of things I would consider “Dealbreakers” for myself. I also polled some girlfriends to get some second opinions and fresh ideas. The following are 50 serious Dealbreakers…guys, you may want to take notes…

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Online Dating Profiles: A couple paragraphs that can change your life

by Ed Attanasio

Because I am a writer, many of my friends ask me all the time to write their online profiles to post on dating web sites. I always feel like it’s a big commitment — kind of like writing someone’s resume or biography. There’s a lot at stake and the pressure to write something really good about someone can be very exhausting, because many of my friends are highly dysfunctional. How do you effectively describe the essence of a human being in just a few paragraphs? Without lying or opening yourself up to a civil suit?

I must admit, I have gotten pretty adept at it over the years. The secret to writing a great profile is to emphasize the good things about people while minimizing their shortcomings. Stretching the truth slightly is no crime and many people do it.

No matter how bad or messed up some people are, you can usually find something positive to write about them. They say that Attila the Hun was really nice to his elephants (“loves animals”). Hitler was a vegetarian (“healthy and fit”). And legend has it that Genghis Khan took really good care of his fu manchu (“well-groomed”).

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