Intercity Jewish Dating

Dating Distance is not usually what anyone would want – but for some people this is the only way they could meet. With on-line site’s this is more of a possibility and “doors” can be broader and the matches can be made. 

Don’t close yourself off to Intercity Dating or even International, it is more difficult but you can make it work if it is meant to be. It will be more of a challenge, and you will require some creativity to keep it going but it could be worth it. It may be best to speak to each other a few times before you schedule the first meeting – which will require one of you to travel.

Plan ahead -  how will you get there – where will you stay – who will be the one to travel first.

Things to think about – if the date doesn’t work out – what will you do?

Here are some tips: some that I  personally did while Intercity Dating:

1. If you have friends in the city you are traveling to, made arrangements to stay with them – this way make the best of the time away

2. If you go to  a new city – stay at a Hotel -  “research” the city – so if things don’t work out make a mini-vacation so at least you get to enjoy yourself and do some site-seeing

3.  Help the person with there travel plans – make arrangements for them to being picked up at the Airport, or at least offer – or assist with a place to stay. Highly recommend the first visit even if they offer do not stay at there place. Just in case things don’t work out it may be very uncomfortable for the both of you.

4. Don’t plan to be together every second of the day. If things go well – then plans can be changed easier then trying to make arrangements to find things to do…

5. Make the first visit a short one, but if you can extend it if things work out then that would be great.

6. No matter what happens make the best of the time away.

Technorati Tags: Intercity Dating, Jewish dating, Tips to Dating Distance

Purim Time: Jewish Dating

Purim – It is a day to hide behind the mask. We dress up, and play make believe. We can be who ever we want to. Many people get a little drunk, and we “stamp” out Haman’s name when we read the Megillah.  Maybe we should think about this.

Today more and more people are asking when dating, one question. What is it? How does he/she look? We ask about the physical being of the person before anything else. Let’s think about this. We also play dating “games” you say you are serious but never actually follow through on matches. You call a person and figure if the conversation doesn’t go well – why bother to give it a second chance. You go out on a date, but it may not go well – so instead of being a little considerate and making the best of the situation, you leave through the back (maybe without even settling the bill). Instead of giving it a chance or being more open.  

Physical look – not what attributes this person has, not if they are a good person, or what type of family they are from. We look first at the physical. I am not saying this is wrong, of course we want to be attracted to our partner, and there has to be chemistry, but attraction and chemistry can also grow. Who the person is, and what they can bring to the relationship probably won’t. Are they kind, considerate, can they be a provider, and you don’t need to have a great profession today to be able to provide for your family (as we have seen with so many people out of work) you need someone who can be there through emotional support, hardships that will happen in your daily life.

Socially – you want someone who is committed – not into the “partying” ( or maybe you still want this) but think if this is how you want to be as you want to begin a relationship – are you still trying to be a kid, maybe it is time to “grow up”.It is time to stop hiding behind the masks, playing make believe, and stamping out what isn’t right. It is time to make commitments, be realistic, and maybe take a few more chances.

Purim Semach

Technorati Tags: Committment, Dating, Jewish dating

Matchmaker Please make me a Match

It seems like we have gone full circle, today hearing Matchmaker, Matchmaker make me a match, find me a find, catch me a catch…is not so uncommon. Between the on-line Jewish Dating Sites, and an actual matchmaker working for you, this has become the way of the 90’s and now ’10’s

I decided to see how popular this word has become on-line and just bringing up the word – you get on-line matchmaker services, a list of professional matchmaker’s and there now is even a course to become a Professional Matchmaker – Certificate upon completion

So why today is this process not just for the religious communities anymore? Is it because Jewish Dating has become so difficult? Or that we spend so much time working, playing and being involved in so many different activities that we can’t meet anyone   

Having a matchmaker is very common today. Is this concept considered “buying love” – or paying for a service? It is just one more outlet out there for dating today, and the Jewish Matchmaker has become the way of the present as well. 

Technorati Tags: Jewish dating, Jewish Dating Sites, Matchmaker, On-line, Paying for a service

Jewish Dating, Network

With JEWISH DATING, what is very important at any age is to Network. At any age, Jewish Dating is not just saying you are ready, it is the start to informing everyone you are ready.

You have to get out there, speak to people, and use every possible means to finding yourself a partner. I know this is easy to say, but how do you go about this?

First lets look at some of the conventional ways, in Networking in Jewish Dating . If you are religious you may choose to use a Shaddchan, (Matchmaker). For this it is best to speak to people in your community, or your local Rabbi to find out who is the best Shadchan for your age and religious level. But wait, more and more people are using Shadchan’s and today you do not have to be “frum” to use  one. There are services, and the internet to help you find them. There are even on-line sites’ such as Sawyouatsinai and Jretromatch that take the idea of you having a Shadchan ( Matchmaker) and they work with you, to finding you matches.

Jewish Singles’ event’s. This has been a typical way to meet and mingle. Every local community run’s event’s and it just requires you to ask around, look in the local Jewish Paper’s, and internet search,  to find some. From Speed-dating, to Dinner’s Party’s and now wonderful Single’s Vacation’s.

Jewish Adventure Clubs. If you are Athletic there are many out there from Skiing Clubs, to Hiking.

Then you have the real NETWORK - friends, family, neighbor’s, and co-workers. Speak to people, ask around you can’t be shy. Inform people you are wanting to meet, and tell them the type of person you are looking for. Ask them to speak to others and “put your name out” Start going out more, get yourself known in your community. If people don’t know who you are it makes it very difficult.

Just remember – you can’t just sit around and expect something to happen – today you have to be a little more pro-active, so just get out there and help make it happen.

Technorati Tags: Dating Services, Jewish dating, Jewish singles events, Network, On-line sites, Shaddchan

Dating in 2010

This will be my last post for 2009 so here goes…

For 2010 - what can you change to improve the way you may be looking for a potential partner?

Are you being too “picky”? Are you not getting out there enough? Are you spending to much time at the office, that you just don’t know where to go to meet someone?

Well if you answered YES to anyone of there, how about trying one of the many On-line Dating Sites. I am partial ( well considering that is where I spend most of my days, trying to make matches for many of you - or hope to be) for Sawyouatsinai - if you are a religious, or a little more Observant, and Jretromatch for the non-religious. Sign up - the cost is minimal when you consider you are looking for your spouse.

Go in with a great attitute, if you don’t meet your furture spouse, you may meet some wonderful people - have some fun going out on dates, or speaking with people, but the main thing - you are doing what you can.

 With just under a 1000 members being succesfully matched, and today are either happily married, some even with children, and other’s planning there day. To the 100’s that are currently dating - you too can be included in these numbers.

Just don’t sit around and wait, as waiting will not help you - being proactive will…

 Lets have a great 2010 - and hope you will be one of the many that will be succesfully matched and that your name will be there with all the other’s

Another Engagment

Wow, the last time was a month ago, and the same words. It has happened again. I got the message that I made another match. I spoke to her, and she is so thrilled - and thankful.

No - I am thankful that I can do this, bring a couple together. What was even better, in one week - we found out that there where 2 engagements on our site, another matchmaker as well. This is so thrilling for us.

So you never know when it could happen, I tell members when they ask we  or complain when the are not getting enough matches. It only takes “one”. When will that “one” be, I can’t answer that question. Will it be from the site, through a friend, or meeting someone on the street? I don’t know. So keep trying everything, speak to anyone and everyone. I keep saying this, everyone possible resource available to you, you never know how or when it will happen to you.

 Lets just continue to match, and hope that next week (and this one) will bring us many more engagements.